No Painted Savior

When I am not aware of my sin and rebellion against God - of my selfish, conceited, entitled, judgmental, mean-spirited, unfaithful actions and thoughts and words - I am tempted to think of myself as mostly good.  I am tempted to believe that I mostly have it all together; that yes, I am a sinner in need of grace, but not that much grace.  

And when I am too aware of my obedience (as I am all too often), I become self-righteous, believing that I am morally pure/superior, deserving of good things from God and others on my own merits and looking down on others for their (perceived) moral inferiority.

But the reality is that I am a much greater sinner than I believe myself to be and much less obedient than I think.

Martin Luther in a letter to George Spalatin:

"My faithful request and admonition is that you join our company and associate with us, who are real, great, and hard-boiled sinners.  You must by no means make Christ to seem paltry and trifling to us, as though He could be our Helper only when we want to be rid from imaginary, nominal, and childish sins. No, no!  That would be no good for us.  He must rather be a Savior and Redeemer for real, great, grievous, and damnable transgressions and iniquities, yea, from the very greatest and most shocking sins; to be brief, from all sins added together in a grand total [...]

You want to be painted sinner and, accordingly, expect to have in Christ a painted Savior.  You will have to get used to the belief that Christ is a real Savior and you a real sinner.  For God is neither jesting nor dealing in imaginary affairs, but He was greatly and most assuredly in earnest when He sent His own Son into the world and sacrificed Him for our sakes."

I am in the group of "real, great, hard-boiled sinners."  As pastor, author, and seminary professor Steve Brown says, "I like to sin.  If I didn't like to sin, I wouldn't sin."

How often do I pray and ask God for "help" as if what I need from Him is a little boost; just a little bit of forgiveness (for my "small" sins), just a little bit of sanctification.  All too often what I say to God is basically, "Hey I got this under control and all, but if You wouldn't mind giving me a boost up that wouldn't hurt.  You know, if You don't mind - because I can handle it if not."

But this isn't reality.  In reality, I am face down in a ditch with no strength or moral character left, no way to get myself out if He doesn't rescue me.  In reality, I am at the bottom of the bottomless pit of my sin and self-righteousness with no way out and no hope if Jesus doesn't come down and save me. In reality, I have nothing if not "a Savior and Redeemer for real, great, grievous, and damnable transgressions and iniquities" - because that's what I have - real, great, grievous, damnable transgressions and iniquities.

Praise God that He sent His own Son (who had no sin, only perfect obedience) into the world and sacrificed Him for screwed up, broken, self-righteous, self-deluding people like me.